Wednesday, June 09, 2004
· posted at 1:40 PM
Disclaimer: I am not a basketball expert. The last time I played a game of basketball, I was donned in blue and yellow Mustang PE shirt and shorts. From then on out, my ball-handling experience has been limited to a) shooting hoops in my cracked concrete backyard where the hoop is about a toddler’s height short of regulation and b) playing “HORSE” – granny shots NOT allowed. I have never attended a NBA game, college game, and perhaps not even a high school CIF game. I have never seen Mark McGrath not wash his hands at the Staples Center or booed William Hung off the stage at halftime (although, gawd would I like to. I’m also realizing now how thankful I am for the letter “a” that prevents us from sharing the same pinyin name). My fan experience has been limited to jumping up and down and beating on coffee tables. In essence what I’m saying is that I’m probably not qualified to write a piece like this… but really, obviously, it’s never stopped me from shooting off my mouth before.
The ball don’t lie.
Something unusually strange occurred today. No, I'm not talking about the Venus transit or Fred Durst’s act of seduction. No, hell has not frozen over – but brace yourself. I’m about to talk sports. Not only that, but I've been doing it all day. I found myself cornering my supervisor asking, "Why, why, why didn't Larry Brown hack Shaq?" I interrogated the teens coming into the clinic with, "Who are you rooting for?" hoping that they would reply "Lakers" just so I could jump into my tirade. I even crossed that precious line that I draw with my coworkers and actually talked about a topic of my interest that made me impassioned.
Let's talk Game 2. Pistons are up 6 points with 47 seconds to go. 10 seconds left, Pistons up by 3 and Lakers call a time-out. You KNOW Phil Jackson is planning a play involving Kobe Bryant and a 3-pointer. I KNOW Phil Jackson is planning a play involving Bryant and a 3-pointer... and I don't even knowbaseball basketball!
Okay Larry - I know you're in a tough spot. If you foul, the media will call your play dishonorable, you risk a basket plus sending a shooter to the line and going into overtime, or you risk a 4-pt play that ends the game. If you don’t foul, the media will attack you for that and you risk Bryant getting the ball and bringing it to overtime. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. But this is Game 2 of the Playoffs! You're up 1 game and no team has ever won the Playoffs after losing two at home. What are you doing?? Apparently letting Bryant make the 3-pointer. Oh and 2.1 seconds left on the clock and THAT's the play you want to close out the 4th quarter with? I've seen the alley-oops and the screens you've executed following time-outs... You make magic happen after time-outs!
I can't write about the game anymore, I've got Morgan Spurlock’s mid-documentary blood pressure right now. Long story short, Lakers in overtime and back to Detroit.
Sure you could blame Ben Wallace for the stupid foul on Shaq that resulted in the “and one” or any of the Pistons for not making one more free throw during the game or some basketball deity that graced O’Neal with a 50+ free throw percentage... I blame Larry Brown.
The coach is the man behind the players, instructing them, and guiding them. In that final 10 seconds, forget the preceding 47 minutes, forget the could-have, should-have ... that is all you LB. From his point of view, I can understand that he knows his Pistons are extremely capable of triumphing over the Lakers and he wants to prove it. Had he fouled, it would be have been a victory, but the media would probably declare it the easy way out, a passive victory (despite the previous 47 minutes) rather than a smart play. Plus had the Pistons gone up 2-0, the media would spout even more trash not touting the Pistons’ talent and ability, but the Lakers’ lack of effort and failure to “show up.”
Which brings me to an issue more frustrating than the Game 2 loss – the media coverage of the Playoffs (and by media I mean newspaper writers, ESPN columnists, sportscasters, etc. – Lakers fans should be included as well because they talk and regurgitate so much trash. It’s un-Belize-able). The majority of these people are pro-Lakers and they’re not even attempting to give an unbiased account or commentary of the Playoffs.
I've seen the book Bias: A CBS Insider Exposes How the Media Distort the News and I’m sure they intend it more to uncover the bias in world stories and politics, but it’s clearly evident in the sports sector as well.
The footage. Why am I seeing Phil Jackson’s face reacting to a play rather than seeing the slow-mo of a play with a questionable call? Why am I seeing Meg Ryan’s face in the crowd rather than a replay of a Wallace block? How come when we cut to commercial break, they play a montage the Lakers’ greatest plays of the night... even when they’re down two digits?
The information. There is a blatant misuse of statistics in sports and seemingly irrelevant facts disguised as deciding factors (mind that this is all from my interpretation as a basketball sub-novice):
I’ve heard comparisons about Lakers top scorers versus Pistons top scorers. Bryant and O’Neal may have higher average points per game, but they pretty much comprise all of the Lakers offense. Whereas on the Pistons you have Billups and Hamilton in that range plus addition offensive threats Rasheed Wallace and Tayshaun Prince. I saw Big Ben Wallace score 18 points in a playoff game – don’t tell me that the Pistons have no offense.
Commentators will mention that this is the Pistons’ third lead in the game and play it down and not mention that Pistons have been leading for like 25 of the 30 minutes played – which I think is more important in this circumstance.
I’ve heard about the players on the Lakers having much more combined NBA Finals experience than the Pistons, but what if that experience is sitting on the bench, on another team, or even on the same team but with different players? What if that experience is running pick and rolls with someone who’s out with an injury? Does it matter?
Following Game 2, amazingly one of the newscasters was praising Rasheed’s work on Malone and how it was working and an easy couple baskets – then he says, “It was working – why’d you stop?!” Because he was double-teamed, fool, and you forget to mention that when he was double-teamed he passed to Prince (I think) for a shot... which he made!
The word choice. Phil Jackson said it. Kobe Bryant said it. Shaquille O’Neal said it. Pistons play a good game of ball. Yet all these sportscasters and columnists talk as though it’s not that the Pistons are good – it’s that the Lakers are bad, they’re not trying, they’re not getting the right calls, they’re injured. I even heard a Lakers fan (one who shares my blood, at that) who said that the Lakers were “teasing” the Pistons by “allowing” that win. Are you nuts? Many said the Lakers would sweep, it’d be over in four. Two players came to the Lakers in search of that elusive championship ring – and you’re going to tell me that the Lakers are just “messing around?” Yes, it’s blatantly obvious that Gary Payton, with his pay cut and five fouls in Game 1 was not trying. If I listened to only post-game commentary, it would sound as though the Lakers dominated the whole game. I even heard the phrase “no contest.” No contest? Right, the game went into overtime clearly because it was such an obvious victory for the Lakers. Above all else, I must have heard the words “give” and “stole” hundreds of times in the past few days. Pistons “stole” the victory. Lakers “gave” away Game 1. As though the win is something the Lakers had, something that’s expected, not something they must earn... As though a team can have the victory in their hand and make a conscious decision to hand it over...
Actually I take it back. You can possess a game and hand it over, because in the case of yesterday’s game...Larry Brown, you just gave it away.
_______________
Okay so they say (or rather my 4th grade teacher who made us study old adages such as "Do unto other as you would have them do unto you," "Don't look a gift horse in the mouth," and "Practice your cursive or you'll be visiting Principal Paddle") that "Every cloud has a silver lining." What are the silver linings from Game 2?
No team has ever lost two at home and gone on to win the Series. So should the Lakers have lost, yet managed to win the Series, they’d be record breaking... and we don’t want any of that.
Pistons definitively proved a point. While the media still rages with words like “where are the Lakers?” there seems to be a slow movement on the part of the media to retract their words and the bookies have been quick to adjust their odds. The fact that Tuesday’s victory was so hard fought by the Lakers show that the Lakers are giving their all and that the teams are much more matched than some had expected.
_______________
Ugly basketball. There’s been much talk about how when a game is low-scoring, it’s “ugly basketball.” Personally, I like when a game is low-scoring, when every basket counts for so much more, when the first team to 70 is the winner, when shots aren’t going in because it’s a forced shot with 2 seconds on the shot clock, and when shots aren’t going in because the shooter is tired after chasing around a player who rubs a sub 6-minute mile. If the teams just ran up and down without hard defense, it wouldn’t be a game, it’d be a drill or practice.
Beautiful is the sound of a bricked shot from an exhausted player at the free throw. Beautiful is Ben Wallace missing a shot, yet able to traverse the court in time to swat away the opposing team’s shot attempt. Beautiful is Tayshaun Prince blocking Reggie Miller’s game-tying lay-up and winding up in the 7th row of the audience.
Go Pistons. Bring on Darko.
The ball don’t lie.
Something unusually strange occurred today. No, I'm not talking about the Venus transit or Fred Durst’s act of seduction. No, hell has not frozen over – but brace yourself. I’m about to talk sports. Not only that, but I've been doing it all day. I found myself cornering my supervisor asking, "Why, why, why didn't Larry Brown hack Shaq?" I interrogated the teens coming into the clinic with, "Who are you rooting for?" hoping that they would reply "Lakers" just so I could jump into my tirade. I even crossed that precious line that I draw with my coworkers and actually talked about a topic of my interest that made me impassioned.
Let's talk Game 2. Pistons are up 6 points with 47 seconds to go. 10 seconds left, Pistons up by 3 and Lakers call a time-out. You KNOW Phil Jackson is planning a play involving Kobe Bryant and a 3-pointer. I KNOW Phil Jackson is planning a play involving Bryant and a 3-pointer... and I don't even know
Okay Larry - I know you're in a tough spot. If you foul, the media will call your play dishonorable, you risk a basket plus sending a shooter to the line and going into overtime, or you risk a 4-pt play that ends the game. If you don’t foul, the media will attack you for that and you risk Bryant getting the ball and bringing it to overtime. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. But this is Game 2 of the Playoffs! You're up 1 game and no team has ever won the Playoffs after losing two at home. What are you doing?? Apparently letting Bryant make the 3-pointer. Oh and 2.1 seconds left on the clock and THAT's the play you want to close out the 4th quarter with? I've seen the alley-oops and the screens you've executed following time-outs... You make magic happen after time-outs!
I can't write about the game anymore, I've got Morgan Spurlock’s mid-documentary blood pressure right now. Long story short, Lakers in overtime and back to Detroit.
Sure you could blame Ben Wallace for the stupid foul on Shaq that resulted in the “and one” or any of the Pistons for not making one more free throw during the game or some basketball deity that graced O’Neal with a 50+ free throw percentage... I blame Larry Brown.
The coach is the man behind the players, instructing them, and guiding them. In that final 10 seconds, forget the preceding 47 minutes, forget the could-have, should-have ... that is all you LB. From his point of view, I can understand that he knows his Pistons are extremely capable of triumphing over the Lakers and he wants to prove it. Had he fouled, it would be have been a victory, but the media would probably declare it the easy way out, a passive victory (despite the previous 47 minutes) rather than a smart play. Plus had the Pistons gone up 2-0, the media would spout even more trash not touting the Pistons’ talent and ability, but the Lakers’ lack of effort and failure to “show up.”
Which brings me to an issue more frustrating than the Game 2 loss – the media coverage of the Playoffs (and by media I mean newspaper writers, ESPN columnists, sportscasters, etc. – Lakers fans should be included as well because they talk and regurgitate so much trash. It’s un-Belize-able). The majority of these people are pro-Lakers and they’re not even attempting to give an unbiased account or commentary of the Playoffs.
I've seen the book Bias: A CBS Insider Exposes How the Media Distort the News and I’m sure they intend it more to uncover the bias in world stories and politics, but it’s clearly evident in the sports sector as well.
The footage. Why am I seeing Phil Jackson’s face reacting to a play rather than seeing the slow-mo of a play with a questionable call? Why am I seeing Meg Ryan’s face in the crowd rather than a replay of a Wallace block? How come when we cut to commercial break, they play a montage the Lakers’ greatest plays of the night... even when they’re down two digits?
The information. There is a blatant misuse of statistics in sports and seemingly irrelevant facts disguised as deciding factors (mind that this is all from my interpretation as a basketball sub-novice):
I’ve heard comparisons about Lakers top scorers versus Pistons top scorers. Bryant and O’Neal may have higher average points per game, but they pretty much comprise all of the Lakers offense. Whereas on the Pistons you have Billups and Hamilton in that range plus addition offensive threats Rasheed Wallace and Tayshaun Prince. I saw Big Ben Wallace score 18 points in a playoff game – don’t tell me that the Pistons have no offense.
Commentators will mention that this is the Pistons’ third lead in the game and play it down and not mention that Pistons have been leading for like 25 of the 30 minutes played – which I think is more important in this circumstance.
I’ve heard about the players on the Lakers having much more combined NBA Finals experience than the Pistons, but what if that experience is sitting on the bench, on another team, or even on the same team but with different players? What if that experience is running pick and rolls with someone who’s out with an injury? Does it matter?
Following Game 2, amazingly one of the newscasters was praising Rasheed’s work on Malone and how it was working and an easy couple baskets – then he says, “It was working – why’d you stop?!” Because he was double-teamed, fool, and you forget to mention that when he was double-teamed he passed to Prince (I think) for a shot... which he made!
The word choice. Phil Jackson said it. Kobe Bryant said it. Shaquille O’Neal said it. Pistons play a good game of ball. Yet all these sportscasters and columnists talk as though it’s not that the Pistons are good – it’s that the Lakers are bad, they’re not trying, they’re not getting the right calls, they’re injured. I even heard a Lakers fan (one who shares my blood, at that) who said that the Lakers were “teasing” the Pistons by “allowing” that win. Are you nuts? Many said the Lakers would sweep, it’d be over in four. Two players came to the Lakers in search of that elusive championship ring – and you’re going to tell me that the Lakers are just “messing around?” Yes, it’s blatantly obvious that Gary Payton, with his pay cut and five fouls in Game 1 was not trying. If I listened to only post-game commentary, it would sound as though the Lakers dominated the whole game. I even heard the phrase “no contest.” No contest? Right, the game went into overtime clearly because it was such an obvious victory for the Lakers. Above all else, I must have heard the words “give” and “stole” hundreds of times in the past few days. Pistons “stole” the victory. Lakers “gave” away Game 1. As though the win is something the Lakers had, something that’s expected, not something they must earn... As though a team can have the victory in their hand and make a conscious decision to hand it over...
Actually I take it back. You can possess a game and hand it over, because in the case of yesterday’s game...Larry Brown, you just gave it away.
_______________
Okay so they say (or rather my 4th grade teacher who made us study old adages such as "Do unto other as you would have them do unto you," "Don't look a gift horse in the mouth," and "Practice your cursive or you'll be visiting Principal Paddle") that "Every cloud has a silver lining." What are the silver linings from Game 2?
No team has ever lost two at home and gone on to win the Series. So should the Lakers have lost, yet managed to win the Series, they’d be record breaking... and we don’t want any of that.
Pistons definitively proved a point. While the media still rages with words like “where are the Lakers?” there seems to be a slow movement on the part of the media to retract their words and the bookies have been quick to adjust their odds. The fact that Tuesday’s victory was so hard fought by the Lakers show that the Lakers are giving their all and that the teams are much more matched than some had expected.
_______________
Ugly basketball. There’s been much talk about how when a game is low-scoring, it’s “ugly basketball.” Personally, I like when a game is low-scoring, when every basket counts for so much more, when the first team to 70 is the winner, when shots aren’t going in because it’s a forced shot with 2 seconds on the shot clock, and when shots aren’t going in because the shooter is tired after chasing around a player who rubs a sub 6-minute mile. If the teams just ran up and down without hard defense, it wouldn’t be a game, it’d be a drill or practice.
Beautiful is the sound of a bricked shot from an exhausted player at the free throw. Beautiful is Ben Wallace missing a shot, yet able to traverse the court in time to swat away the opposing team’s shot attempt. Beautiful is Tayshaun Prince blocking Reggie Miller’s game-tying lay-up and winding up in the 7th row of the audience.
Go Pistons. Bring on Darko.
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Ears closed shut. I found the most heinous misspe...
Prozac nation. Garden State, Zach Braff's Reality ...
Clairvoyant. There is this woman at my work... She...
Kudos, it’s not just a snack food. The word kudos...
Dialogue from the game Catch Phrase: Karen: Item ...
Periodic Table of Sloth. I don't understand how t...
Len: I have this theory, all right. Everybody does...
...she's one of these really great-looking people ...
Laundry quarters. Change is usually something so g...
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babie goose ryan
bluemouse
daves son
dawntaught
desiree
diorama
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