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Thursday, August 17, 2006 · posted at 8:15 AM

Why We Fight. When I was in college, I met many people who were well-traveled after annual vacations with their parents to foreign locales such as Thailand and France and India. I was so envious and wondered why my family never went on vacations like that. Now, upon reflecting on my recent trip to Taiwan with my parents, I remember why we don't.

Fight #1 - Cerritos
We've not even left the house yet and the 'rents are arguing about suitcases, and how we have too many of them and they are too heavy. Reality: They have too many of them. I have one suitcase which is 3/4 filled with Barbies (my mom's notion of what a 15 year old Taiwanese girl wants) and assorted sundries like Planters Peanuts.

Fight #2 - Somewhere over the Pacific Ocean
On the plane my parents start bickering, loudly of course - the volume is always turned up partly because my dad is hard of hearing and partly because they're just like that. This time it's about my mom's desire to buy duty-free liquor for our relatives. Apparently they must be lushes, as the number of bottles my mom tries to purchase starts at one and increases to four, plus some cosmetics, chocolates, perfumes, and some angry eyes and a bouncy ball... My dad immediately vetoes this idea and I hear them "discussing" it as I make my way to the aft of the plane where I hide in the xi shou jian (bathroom).

Fight #3 - Grand Palace Museum
Passport anxiety. My mom needs to know exactly where their passports are as the tour guide is droning on about the Ming Dynasty. Apparently something about porcelain screams "Where are your documents?" Solution? My mom practically dumps the contents of her purse out in search of the passports, which she finds in the zippered portion of her purse - exactly where my dad said they were.

Fight #4 - Tour bus
My dad wants to know how much money they changed at the airport. I have no clue - only that they probably walked away with half of what the money was actually worth since airport currency exchange is on par with highway robbery. Da sheng (loud voices) yet again... about money... for the whole bus to hear. Luckily the people behind us are wai guo ren (foreigners from NZ) and riben ren (Japanese), however, right in front is the Chinese family from Temple City. Oh well, I think they long ago decided we were not good company.

Fight #5 - Hotel elevator
We're on our way to dinner and my mom has just proceeded to push half of the elevator buttons because she wants to see the floors she's not allowed on (banquet hall floors). Even if we were allowed on them, I'm not sure I'd want to eat in a place that has pink tulle draped all over the seats.

Cheesy Chinese banquet anyone? Anyone?
Fight #6-99 - Somewhere in Taiwan
They're all the same, yet varied enough to be rehashed at every instance...

Fight #100 - Home stretch
We've just unlocked the door and my parents are already arguing because they both just paid the shuttle driver.

----------

They say that nothing in life is free.
     Plane ticket: $0
     Four-day tour: $0
     Room & board at a-gong's: $0
     Last threads of my sanity: priceless



	Thursday, August 17, 2006 · posted at 8:15 AM Why We Fight. When I was in college, I met many people who were well-traveled after annual vacations with their parents to foreign locales such as Thailand and France and India. I was so envious and wondered why my family never went on vacations like that. Now, upon reflecting on my recent trip to Taiwan with my parents, I remember why we don't. Fight #1 - Cerritos We've not even left the house yet and the 'rents are arguing about suitcases, and how we have too many of them and they are too heavy. Reality: They have too many of them. I have one suitcase which is 3/4 filled with Barbies (my mom's notion of what a 15 year old Taiwanese girl wants) and assorted sundries like Planters Peanuts. Fight #2 - Somewhere over the Pacific Ocean On the plane my parents start bickering, loudly of course - the volume is always turned up partly because my dad is hard of hearing and partly because they're just like that. This time it's about my mom's desire to buy duty-free liquor for our relatives. Apparently they must be lushes, as the number of bottles my mom tries to purchase starts at one and increases to four, plus some cosmetics, chocolates, perfumes, and some angry eyes and a bouncy ball... My dad immediately vetoes this idea and I hear them "discussing" it as I make my way to the aft of the plane where I hide in the xi shou jian (bathroom). Fight #3 - Grand Palace Museum Passport anxiety. My mom needs to know exactly where their passports are as the tour guide is droning on about the Ming Dynasty. Apparently something about porcelain screams "Where are your documents?" Solution? My mom practically dumps the contents of her purse out in search of the passports, which she finds in the zippered portion of her purse - exactly where my dad said they were. Fight #4 - Tour bus My dad wants to know how much money they changed at the airport. I have no clue - only that they probably walked away with half of what the money was actually worth since airport currency exchange is on par with highway robbery. Da sheng (loud voices) yet again... about money... for the whole bus to hear. Luckily the people behind us are wai guo ren (foreigners from NZ) and riben ren (Japanese), however, right in front is the Chinese family from Temple City. Oh well, I think they long ago decided we were not good company. Fight #5 - Hotel elevator We're on our way to dinner and my mom has just proceeded to push half of the elevator buttons because she wants to see the floors she's not allowed on (banquet hall floors). Even if we were allowed on them, I'm not sure I'd want to eat in a place that has pink tulle draped all over the seats. Cheesy Chinese banquet anyone? Anyone? Fight #6-99 - Somewhere in Taiwan They're all the same, yet varied enough to be rehashed at every instance... Fight #100 - Home stretch We've just unlocked the door and my parents are already arguing because they both just paid the shuttle driver. ---------- They say that nothing in life is free. Plane ticket: $0 Four-day tour: $0 Room & board at a-gong's: $0 Last threads of my sanity: priceless	Recent Posts Gullible's Travels. As Christian Finnegan once sai... Crimes and MisdemeanorsWe're all faced throughout ... Girls For Breakfast. Eighty percent of the reason ... What Jim had, above all, was enthusiasm, He'd weig... To Jim, attempts at imitation would put the emphas... Little sleep, no investment portfolio, no family a... The Requisite of Personal ResponsibilityIn a study... Crunchy granola. adj. A term used to describe a pe... Will work for (campus)food, a dot com.One seldom h... the red carpet. Justin's movie premiered tonight.... Morning news babie goose ryan bluemouse daves son dawntaught desiree diorama emily escadawg galveric high entropy invisible cube jepgato kyellow lilly mhuang mogbert nudream starfish + coffee verbivore Archives March 2004 April 2004 May 2004 June 2004 July 2004 August 2004 September 2004 October 2004 November 2004 December 2004 January 2005 February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 January 2007 March 2007 April 2007 November 2008

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