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Thursday, June 17, 2004 · posted at 8:58 PM

Super Size Me. My body must hate me by now. I dragged my beaten and bruised body (courtesy of rock climbing) to the SD County Fair and proceeded to beat and bruise myself from the inside out by gorging on all things deep-fried . Call it Glutton Bowl 2004 and me Takeru Kobayashi.

Carny food is the highlight of county fairs. Beyond blue ribbon roses, live infomercials for products such as the Eggstractor (laziness has reached a new low if need a plastic pump to peel an egg – arthritis and CTS sufferers notwithstanding), and the endless stands of cheap beaded things, knick knacks and other Tchotchke... is the marvel that is fair food.

Carny food comes in two varieties:

Grilled/barbequed. This is not only the carnivorous options of ribs, chicken and turkey legs the length of my arm, but also grilled corn, artichoke hearts and garlic mushrooms.

Deep-fried. This is your anything and everything else category including but not limited to, Australian battered potatoes, cheese-on-a-stick, fried zucchini, fish and chips, funnel cakes and, of course, the infamous fried Snickers bar and fried Twinkie (with your choice of powdered sugar, chocolate drizzle or raspberry sauce).

Carny food also comes in two sizes: large and Texas. Large being a mountain of tater chips, and Texas being foot-long corndogs. Drink size is excluded – when they say small, they mean small.

A coworker told me that this year’s fair offered fried cheesecake (false) and fried pickles (also false). I think the misconception stemmed from the fact that these foods were served on sticks (which is usually reserved for foods that are dipped, battered, and given a hot oil bath). So while I couldn’t find a heart-attack-on-a-stick fried cheesecake, I’m sure my chocolate-dipped, Oreo-covered cheesecake came pretty close in measures of calories, sugar, fat, and artery-clogging goodness.

My Childhood Disorders professor from college said that no one ever wakes up 10 pounds heavier, but I’d really like to contest that statement.

Got life insurance? Go to the fair.
_______________

Oh and there’s also game vendors (which are oddly reminiscent of vendors in Mexico – “hey let me show you my game,” “win something for your wife and your girlfriend”), rides, musical performances by the likes of Smashmouth, Lifehouse, and Maroon 5, and a petting zoo with tethered and drugged livestock.



	Thursday, June 17, 2004 · posted at 8:58 PM Super Size Me. My body must hate me by now. I dragged my beaten and bruised body (courtesy of rock climbing) to the SD County Fair and proceeded to beat and bruise myself from the inside out by gorging on all things deep-fried . Call it Glutton Bowl 2004 and me Takeru Kobayashi. Carny food is the highlight of county fairs. Beyond blue ribbon roses, live infomercials for products such as the Eggstractor (laziness has reached a new low if need a plastic pump to peel an egg – arthritis and CTS sufferers notwithstanding), and the endless stands of cheap beaded things, knick knacks and other Tchotchke... is the marvel that is fair food. Carny food comes in two varieties: Grilled/barbequed. This is not only the carnivorous options of ribs, chicken and turkey legs the length of my arm, but also grilled corn, artichoke hearts and garlic mushrooms. Deep-fried. This is your anything and everything else category including but not limited to, Australian battered potatoes, cheese-on-a-stick, fried zucchini, fish and chips, funnel cakes and, of course, the infamous fried Snickers bar and fried Twinkie (with your choice of powdered sugar, chocolate drizzle or raspberry sauce). Carny food also comes in two sizes: large and Texas. Large being a mountain of tater chips, and Texas being foot-long corndogs. Drink size is excluded – when they say small, they mean small. A coworker told me that this year’s fair offered fried cheesecake (false) and fried pickles (also false). I think the misconception stemmed from the fact that these foods were served on sticks (which is usually reserved for foods that are dipped, battered, and given a hot oil bath). So while I couldn’t find a heart-attack-on-a-stick fried cheesecake, I’m sure my chocolate-dipped, Oreo-covered cheesecake came pretty close in measures of calories, sugar, fat, and artery-clogging goodness. My Childhood Disorders professor from college said that no one ever wakes up 10 pounds heavier, but I’d really like to contest that statement. Got life insurance? Go to the fair. _______________ Oh and there’s also game vendors (which are oddly reminiscent of vendors in Mexico – “hey let me show you my game,” “win something for your wife and your girlfriend”), rides, musical performances by the likes of Smashmouth, Lifehouse, and Maroon 5, and a petting zoo with tethered and drugged livestock.	Recent Posts To infinity and beyond. May, who introduces me to ... There's something of the mudslide about you. You ... I am a writer. I want to be a published writer. ... Disclaimer: I am not a basketball expert. The las... Swiss cheesed. I feel myself getting dumber. Elo... Ears closed shut. I found the most heinous misspe... Prozac nation. Garden State, Zach Braff's Reality ... Clairvoyant. There is this woman at my work... She... Kudos, it’s not just a snack food. The word kudos... Dialogue from the game Catch Phrase: Karen: Item ... Morning news babie goose ryan bluemouse daves son dawntaught desiree diorama emily escadawg galveric high entropy invisible cube jepgato kyellow lilly mhuang mogbert nudream starfish + coffee verbivore Archives March 2004 April 2004 May 2004 June 2004 July 2004 August 2004 September 2004 October 2004 November 2004 December 2004 January 2005 February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 January 2007 March 2007 April 2007 November 2008

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